Healing Hurts…

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For some time now, the Holy Spirit has constantly whispered the words, “healing hurts” to my spirit. I heard it but it never really hit until I was faced with the depth and reality of these two powerful words. These two words can be filled with stories, pain, and more. The authenticity never hits until the story officially begins.

The past week for me has been interesting to say the least but good. Last Thursday morning I was rushed to the ER for an uncomfortable but not life threatening medical issue. After the nurses and doctors did what they could, I was later sent to an ENT who resolved the issue hours later. The following day, I was scheduled to have oral surgery and it has been a journey ever since. Thursday alone was a lesson for me. It truly taught me that there’s a process for healing and to get healing. Although healing is in store, you have to trust God and understand each phase and purpose of the  process.

The song, “Pretty Hurts” by Beyonce probably came to your mind reading this. That’s one song that came to mine. Beyonce talks about the struggles one must go through to achieve this level of beauty. The problem is the level of beauty that the individual goes through is filled with so much physical, mental, and emotional pain to achieve it. Yet, she ends each chorus with, “It’s the soul that needs the surgery.” Isn’t that something to think about? How often do we go through great lengths of pain and suffering to achieve something? For example, when going to school to get a degree, it can be a painful process. The workload and stress can be unbelievable combined with the debt and sleep deprivation can be a whirlwind of pain. We go through this long process to get the degree only to struggle finding a job and reaping the benefits of the debt we worked so hard to accumulate (or maybe it’s just me).

Where am I going with all of this?

Well, we often forget that just as much we go through pain in the natural world, there’s just as much pain in the spiritual world. Healing hurts people. The combined physical, mental, and emotional pain come together to wear on our spiritual lives. The weight of all three can become so heavy that they distract us from the bigger picture. Actually, we often forget there is a bigger picture or purpose coming from all of the combined pain. In the midst of the struggle, we are just thinking, “God where are you?  I need right now!!!!!!” It’s really interesting how during that moment of pure desperation, tears, and panic, we want God to step in immediately and BAM there’s the result. The natural world is filled with process and the spiritual world is filled process yet we forget about the process when it’s time for restoration and healing. Healing hurts people!

We must move forward with the process and trust God even when it’s super difficult. Here’s the process:

Anxiety/panic

The first phase of the process is the anxiety/panic stage. You find yourself in disbelief over the situation. Fear has officially taken over your mind and body and all you want is the solution. You don’t want to wait or sit. You want answers and for the situation to be done immediately. There’s not a lot of peace during this stage and you try your best to pray, read your bible, and trust God but it interferes with your peace. Although you keep telling yourself that everything will be okay, your carnal mind and body immediately remind you of the current state of the situation.

Waiting

The second phase of the process is the waiting period. Waiting 30 seconds or 3 minutes feels like an hour or two. Your mind races with so many thoughts and the more the situation continues or worsens, you want the results NOW! Just like a child anxiously waits to arrive to that final destination asking, “Are we there yet?” we are the same way with God.

We are constantly knocking on the heavenly door asking God when will the time arrive? When will we get the answers or the solution? How much longer? Although it feels like we as adults are far from children, we are seen as the same way in the eyes of God.

The Pain

The second hardest stage in the process is the pain. The pain is the distraction that causes you to forget about God. During this process, you forget about the process and His plan/the big picture. All you know is that you are in pain and it is uncomfortable. This process can be the most agonizing, hardest, and challenging stage to the entire process. Regrets begin to wash over your mind, you wish that this never would have happened, and hope that it will be over in a matter of seconds. It honestly feels like you are in a twilight zone or dreaming a nightmare. However, you fail to think about how much work God is doing during this stage. This is the stage where healing is beginning to take place. This is the part where restoration is being sprung from heaven in our natural laps where we will begin to see results.

Being Uncomfortable

Boy oh boy!! This stage can be draining. After overcoming the panic, waiting, and the pain, it feels like life is just getting worse be the second. On the flip side of the pain, lies the uncomfortable stage. It’s far better than the pain you just experienced and now you are in the midst of trying to find the comfort you once had before. Without realizing that God’s operation is now over, you are now transitioning into the healing phase. New thoughts and questions may arise as you finally comprehend what you just faced.

Healing

You’ve come so far and although you’ve faced so much, there’s still challenges, pain, and waiting. Why? Because you are in the healing phase. The healing phase is compiled of blood, sweat, tears, and a lot of patience. This is the season that you will feel may last a lifetime. People will come and go. Time will go by and yet you feel left behind and confused. The prayers of begging and pleading for God to come through will become more draining as you your mental and emotional state of mind is officially shot. Progression will take place, but it will come at a slow rate. You are constantly thinking to yourself how glad you will be when all of this will be behind you.

The Results

After all of the phases have come and gone, the finish line is within arm’s reach. You can see it. You can smell it. And you can taste the victory. You focus on how much you’ve been through and transition your journey into motivation to finish. You know you can do it and you can feel it in your spirit. Upon reaching the end, you’re relieved and finally take the breath of victory thanking God it’s over. You made it. Although it was a long process, you’re so proud realizing what you’ve faced. Finally, you tell your testimony to help someone else. Peace arises in your spirit as you face the new day of the new season. Because you have come so far, the future challenges that begin to arise don’t phase you because of your faith coming out of this difficult season.

So yes, there is a process. This process can be long and tedious, but it is worth the journey. There will be times when you get frustrated, cry, scream, and beg God to just handle the situation.

Remember, He has and will never fail you. Just like Jesus prayed from the place of fear sweating drops of blood, He trusted the process. And He has won the victory. Jesus is alive and living in you through the Holy Spirit. He’s got the victory so that means that you have the victory as well. Are you ready to receive it?

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One of the Life Lessons I Learned from Palm Sunday

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Mark 11:1-10

11 And when they came nigh to Jerusalem, unto Bethphage and Bethany, at the mount of Olives, he sendeth forth two of his disciples,

And saith unto them, Go your way into the village over against you: and as soon as ye be entered into it, ye shall find a colt tied, whereon never man sat; loose him, and bring him.

And if any man say unto you, Why do ye this? say ye that the Lord hath need of him; and straightway he will send him hither.

And they went their way, and found the colt tied by the door without in a place where two ways met; and they loose him.

And certain of them that stood there said unto them, What do ye, loosing the colt?

And they said unto them even as Jesus had commanded: and they let them go.

And they brought the colt to Jesus, and cast their garments on him; and he sat upon him.

And many spread their garments in the way: and others cut down branches off the trees, and strawed them in the way.

And they that went before, and they that followed, cried, saying, Hosanna; Blessed is he that cometh in the name of the Lord:

10 Blessed be the kingdom of our father David, that cometh in the name of the Lord: Hosanna in the highest.


As a child, I distinctly remember preparing for Easter Sunday. My mother would ensure my sister and I found the perfect Easter poem/speech. I would print this sacred piece and rehearse it at home at least five to seven times before packing it away in a safe place. My heart would race as I would vision myself in front of the congregation reciting this piece. I would think to myself, “Oh I how I will be so glad when this is over.”

Although Sunday School was a vital part of my childhood church experience, Palm Sunday didn’t ring a bell for me until I reached adulthood. Now when I read of Jesus’ triumphant entry and how the crowd would praise Him as the colt walked through the crowd, I find myself thinking of a valuable lesson. Jesus was exalted and praised during His triumphant entry and in less than a week, the crowd would cry out,” Crucify Him!”

How could society betray the precious lamb of God?

The one and only man that was brought into this sinful world bearing no sin.

How could the world betray someone who preached the word of God, healed the sick, and raised the dead with the sound of His voice?

How could the world forget about all of the wonderful things that He has done?

How could the world just look at Him as if He were a criminal?

Yet, here and now before all of that, society thought the world of Him. Screaming out, “Hosanna; Blessed is he that cometh in the name of the Lord: Blessed be the kingdom of our father David, that cometh in the name of the Lord: Hosanna in the highest.”

Although this moment and scripture comes along with so many beautiful lessons, the one lesson that stays with me is how the world can betray us just as they betrayed Jesus. I think we often forget about that when we are so busy trying to become “the next big thing.” We live in a time where everyone desires to have big numbers and big bucks behind their name. We believe that the world cares about our every move, meal, and routine, yet those that will praise you one day will betray you in a short matter of time.

If Jesus was treated this way, what would make us exempt from the same treatment? We are sinners. So how would a sinner be treated better than the one that was and still is sinless? Think about that for a moment.

This passage and lesson should show us that we should be humble and carry the light of Christ in everything we do and everywhere we go. Yes, the story does not end there and we will discuss all of this soon.

As we focus on Jesus’ journey to the cross, let’s not forget about His sacred service and ministry and use this as motivation to focus more on Him. His journey was not in vain. Love started with God. Love is exemplified through Jesus and who He is.

“Dear God, I’m Speechless…”

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If you are a frequent viewer of this blog, you will find that it’s been about a year since my last blog post. So I would like to dedicate this post to 2018.

The beginning of the year…

Upon the beginning of the year, I began to tap into a mild depression. I graduated from college with my B.A. I was finally done with school and was completely empty. Everything I constructed fell to pieces. Honestly, I had no way to fix anything. I could not find a job, my nonprofit was losing things, my stress level was getting worse, and my emotions were taking the best of me. There were times that I sat in my dark room staring at the wall. I felt worthless. I felt like I worked so hard for nothing.

I kept applying for more jobs and heard nothing.

I prayed and felt nothing.

I read the bible and heard nothing.

What more to do? My faith was decreasing by the day. And my prayers turned from long monologues to a few sentences to three words. There came a time when I fell on my knees and said, “God, I’m speechless…” I had nothing to say. I wanted to cry but the tears would not fall. I did not know what to do or how to feel.

One day, I grabbed one of my old computers and found the praise song, “Agnus Dei” by Michael Smith. I closed my eyes and saw a small cabin (goes back to a childhood story). I was inside this cabin sitting at a table with a coffee cup. As soon as I opened my mouth to speak, a man came with his coffee cup and sat down at the table. I could not see His face but I already knew exactly who this man was…my Savior. Although, I could not see all of Him, I knew Him.

I then opened my eyes in amazement and started singing along to the song. Upon closing my eyes again, I saw another vision ( I will share that in another post). My faith began to rise again. My heart begin to feel strength. And for the first time in a while, I cried tears of joy.

Upon the second month of this dark season, one of my high school friends held a prayer gathering. My sister and I both attended and my faith got a little stronger and then decreased again. I was stuck trying to figure out why this dark cloud would not move! Everything I felt before came rushing back. My feelings, emotions, and stress dragged me back into the dark hole I was once in.

One day, I was lying in bed when I got a phone call to come in for an interview. It was not the job I was hoping for but I felt compelled to go.

At the end of the interview, the manager offered me the position. I was somewhat speechless but not in a good way. So… I said yes. I filled out my paperwork and completed all the steps and within two weeks I started my first job.

I distinctly remember my first day was overwhelming to say the least. I thought to myself, “What have  I done!?!” Although I was not overly excited about this new journey, I kept going. It was better than nothing and I had to be grateful for what God had given me. At least I was out of the house..right?

The middle of the year….

I kept working and earned my way into a summer position. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I had the opportunity to continue working with kids and I was rekindling old passions. I was falling in love with this job until it reached the end. It was time for me to go back to the first job. My frustration and stress rose through the roof. I found myself falling back into that dark hole once again!

Upon returning for the new school year, my new supervisor and coworkers were great! I had a different group of kids from the previous year and ended up working ten times harder in the same position. Although it was rough start at the beginning, things began to level out.

The end of the year….

Towards the end of the year, the spark began. When I mean a spark, you know the song that says, “it only takes a spark, to get a fire going.” Yeah, that’s how it was for me. What started out as a spark turned into flames. The flames started at work and continued to get worse. I had a bad reaction to some fire ants. My foot swelled so bad, I could not walk. When I sat up at the end of my bed, I felt the pain rush to my foot. I was in unbelievable pain for days. After getting better, things continued unfolding at work. Then about two months later, came down with a cough which turned out to be pneumonia.

As you can see, the mention of faith and prayer decreased the further you read this blog. That’s how my spiritual journey turned out to be. My faith decreased day by day. I started struggling with doubts about everything. My prayers and daily devotions continued to get shorter.

Things began to get so bad when I was sick and my weakness started to transition into strength.

I was praying for both physical and spiritual strength.

I was praying for another job for both my sister and I.

I was decreeing and declaring healing for myself.

Then one day, I checked my email. I got another job!!!!!

I went back to the doctor and the she told me my pneumonia was gone.

My sister got called in for another job.

I was surrounded with so much joy. I learned the value of answered prayers. I could not contain myself with excitement.

Although this year was long and hard, God came through for me. The beginning was rough, but He continued to show me that He was there all through the year.

I can truly say that there is a God.

He’s not just any God but a God of answers.

A God of faith.

A God of trust.

A wonderful, beautiful, amazing God!!!

When you don’t think that He’s listening, He is! That goes back to the vision I had at the beginning of the year. Jesus had his coffee cup to sit down and listen to me. All those moments when I thought that He couldn’t hear me it turns that He was right there. Jesus answered my prayers when it was time to answer them. What mattered most is that I turned to Him and stayed strong in my faith.

God knows your limits.

He knows when to take you out of situations.

God knows when it’s your time.

You just have to trust Him and KEEP GOING!

There were so many times I wanted to give up on everything.

There were times when I had nothing left. But I kept moving and HE truly came through. So I can say THANK YOU LORD FOR ALL YOU’VE DONE FOR ME!

What is your story and Happy New Year!

Oh How My Big Papa Loves Me So

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Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always been a daddy’s girl. I was the usual little girl that would run to the door when she heard the door open. I was that little girl that sat on her daddy’s lap until I was too old and heavy. I was that little girl that loved to run errands and play basketball with him. One thing that touches me even today is that as long as I want something and my dad can make it happen, it will be done. If it’s in reach, I know I got.

The same way that applies to any child and their father, God works even better. He says, “If I think it’s best for you to have, you can have whatever you like. You’re my child, my baby. I got you.” Whether you have an earthly father or a no father at all, I want you to know that you have a Heavenly Father that wants to fulfill your heart’s desires. He knows what’s best for you. Most of all, He will definitely give it to you if He feels that it’s it’s for you to have.

Yes I refer to Him as…Big Papa. Why? Because the same way a child runs to their dad or granddaddy, I would imagine this relationship to be even better. We run to Him. We run to Him when we’re alone. We run to Him when we’re down. We run to him when we’re happy. We run to him when we’re sad. We run to Him when we’re scared. And we run to Him when there’s nothing else that we could possibly say or do to fix a situation or feel better about one.

He’s a BIG GOD. He’s an omnipotent God. He’s a God of yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He’s a God filled with love, mercy, and kindness. He’s a forgiving God. He’s a God that loves you no matter how many mistakes you have or will make. He’s a God of creation and the author of true love. He’s a God of truth and a God of refuge. He’s a great God. There are a lot of things He protects us, shields us, and delivers us from. We have no idea what we could have faced, but He saved us from it.

He’s our papa because we can go to Him for anything. There’s nothing that He can’t handle. He knew that we would mess up from the beginning of time. So, He gave us Jesus. He knew that we needed to be saved so He introduced us to the cross where Jesus shared His blood for us. He shows us the value of forgiveness every time we repent. He shows us that He loves us with the abundance of blessings that we have. He corrects us as we make mistakes. He talks to us. He comforts us. He LOVES US!!

Take that into consideration the next time you pray. Tell him how much you love Him. Let Him know how thankful you are to know Him and be His child. Say to yourself, “I Have a Big Papa that loves me!!”

God says, “I got you!”

God says, ” I got you just where you need to be right now. At this time, at this moment, you are where I need you to be. Stop looking at what you should do, what you should be doing, or how should be doing. Instead focus on me, focus on being content with where you are, and most of all focus on my presence. I will let you know when it’s time to move forward with your circumstance. Don’t let life tear you down. Your strength comes from me. My son Jesus died for you! YOU ARE MY CHILD, AND I WILL NEVER LET YOU FALL!”

I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God

From my mother’s womb
You have chosen me
Love has called my name
I’ve been born again into your family
Your blood flows through my veins

I’m no longer a slave to fear
I am a child of God

Answered Prayers

It’s so hard when you find yourself stuck in a situation and you just feel like God can’t hear you. You pray and you pray and you pray harder and it feels like they are hitting the ceiling and fall right back into your lap. We all go through it, but the one thing I want you to know is that we need to have childlike faith like stated in the podcast. That little girl kept her faith and her mom eventually came. Keep fighting, keep praying, and most of all keep believing. Never stop believing just because of a temporary circumstance. And yes, I said temporary. Even though that situation may seem permanent, that trouble will not last forever. Nothing last forever. So, just as much as you have hard times, you will have just as many great moments and even more. God is by your side, Jesus died for you to have a more intimate relationship with him, and the Comforter has come to be that source of strength to help you. You are not facing life alone even though it will feel like it. God is an awesome God one who can do all things through the sound of His voice one time. It only takes one time with God, that’s how grand and majestic He is. Your prayers will get answered, but there will be plenty of moments that it will take time. Fast, get a prayer partner, and be confident in the Lord and your situation. It will get better because it always will.

~Spreading God’s Love One Heart at a Time!

It Only Takes a Spark!

It’s New Year’s Eve and you may be out somewhere on your way home, hanging with friends and family, or you could be at home sitting behind a computer live streaming some services like me. No matter what you are doing right now I want you to please read this post with an open heart. I’ve seen a lot of people post about how bad this year has been, but I want you to know this. It only takes a spark! It only takes a spark for your life to turn right side up or upside down. Vulnerability does come in seasons in life, but also there are times when vulnerability must come to an end. Jesus is right there with a hand reaching out to you to say, “My friend, it only takes a spark, and I am the spark in your life. I am waiting to just light your life with my presence, love, and grace like never before!” I want you to know that it only takes a spark and that spark is Jesus!! Times will get tough in our life. Life will be hard. Seasons will come where things will not be in our favor, but we have to keep going and look up, look towards the sky, and look beyond the sky. Life is too short for you to sit and allow your feelings, your mind, and negativity to just drag you through the dirt. God has so many beautiful hidden treasures within the next year that you are not aware of right now, but believe me and you I’m telling you this with so much faith, favor, and love that you will be amazed how He will turn up and turn out in 2017! Take on the New Year with faith, favor, and a spark of happiness because you just don’t know what’s ahead. Life is too short. Come on get up, get moving, and look up for guidance and rely on Jesus Christ for that spark in your life. Happy New Year and God bless 🙂

Expecting the Unexpected

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As we come to closer to December 25th, I think about the beautiful nativity scenes that are displayed and the beautiful story of Mary and Joseph and how they traveled to Bethlehem. Most of all I think of the story that is written in the book of Luke and how it covers the life of Jesus. I then begin to think of the song, “Breath of Heaven” by Amy Grant and while listening to this song I am immediately reminded of Mary’s perspective as she traveled with Joseph and how hard that journey must have been. Then I fast forward and think about how it must have been such a beautiful journey to raise Jesus the Son of God. Think of that for a second, just being able to watch the Savior of the world grow up to save the world. Lastly, I begin to think about the end of his life, but the beginning of eternal life for all of us. As you can see I think of a lot. But that’s not all.

From there I start thinking of myself in comparison to how God chose Mary and Joseph for that particular role. We should use this as a reminder that God chose us for different experiences, to have different perspectives, lives, and to raise the children that He wants us to raise. I think of how we should look at how both Mary and Joseph did not expect that to happen until the time came when Gabriel came to both of them. Nowadays God comes to us in dreams, visions, or just by the sound of his voice reaching out to our heart to do something that we didn’t expect. So this Christmas, let’s not only remember this beautiful story of how Jesus was brought to this earth. I think that we should also focus on hearing the voice of God to ensure that we are fulfilling the purpose and the role that He wants us to play as we live our lives. And finally, as we go into the new year let’s think of how we are fulfilling this purpose and if not how to begin.

3 Types of Life’s Obstacles

There are three types of obstacles in life;
1. God trying to teach you a lesson
2. The devil trying to test you
3. You hindering yourself from your full potential

It’s so super easy to get our daily obstacles and challenges confused. I will say this, there are several moments where it is either 1 or 3, but we don’t recognize it because we are distracted from God at the time. Take your time, pray, and look for the signs around you.

~Ariel Mobley
Spreading God’s Love One Heart at a Time!